I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
