Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
