Kareoke will never be a sober sport
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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