idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
My underwear smells like fireworks.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
