No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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