I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
