when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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