im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
