I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
