Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
