i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
