i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Randomize
