he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
