threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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