I want to stick my p in your. b.
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
