dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
