Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize
