You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Randomize