yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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