I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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