they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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