Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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