protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
