Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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