And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
i barfeds in our rink
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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