i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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