Kareoke will never be a sober sport
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Randomize
