Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize