mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Randomize