I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
