I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize