Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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