apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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