I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Randomize
