I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize