why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
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