and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
