Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize