Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Do vagina's smell?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize