how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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