I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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