her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
They have beer where we have blood.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Randomize
