their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize