I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
