Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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