I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Randomize
