Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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