apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
