Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
