Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
