hell yes lets make some ravioli
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
