I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Randomize
